Asking The Better Question


Do you feel that your conversations with others are pedestrian? Or perhaps the conversation originates with some exciting possibilities but then it quickly devolves into, “The weather has been crazy these last few days.”

Lately, I have been finding it difficult to maintain conversations of value with others. Yes, I am fully aware that not every conversation will develop into an intellectual orgasm, but my most recent conversations have left me feeling rather impotent.

So I began to ask myself:

  • Is it me?
  • Is it them?
  • Or is it the question?

I opted to ask better questions hoping they would lead to an improvement in the conversation. I found two excellent questions on A Learning A Day:

Question 1: What have been among your biggest learnings since we last caught up?
Question 2: What are the decisions you are struggling with and how can I help?

I have been experimenting with these questions; modifying them per circumstance. On average, the results have been rather anemic and being met with blank stares. And I found myself quickly defaulting to “The weather has been crazy these last few days.”

But when the questions are responded too there is an orgasmic evolution of the conversation. A mind-melding experience that takes an otherwise vanilla exchange of words and transforms the trafficking of ideas into a hypnotic dialogue.

So why are some people dazed into being unable to answer the questions? Simple... the ability to search for your possibilities has been placed into a catatonic state.

Instead of sleepwalking through life, free yourself or as Albert Camus explains, “Life should be lived to the point of tears.”

You must be willing to lose yourself in the experience. But how do restart your cathartic journey... by listing your curiosities, experimenting with you passions and living your purpose to the point when you are solving interesting problems.

Simply defined as awaken the seeker within you.