Welcome The Rub

Why do you avoid conflict in your relationships? Is it because you don't want to argue? Or you don't want to be proven to wrong? Or is it something else entirely? Conflict is a necessary ingredient in a relationship -- professional or personal.

I avoided conflict because I want to be liked by everyone. I was a perpetual people pleasure. The issue with that philosophy is if you participate in a relationship where there is never any conflict then how do you grow, learn, reflect and add importance?

Relationships are a gift, but if you want to increase the value of the connection, then you must understand that relationships are not about you. They are about the value you add to the other person. Author, Dale Carnegie has a laundry list of relationship principles, but these four are the most important:

  • Don’t criticize, condemn or complain about other people.
  • Give honest and sincere appreciation of other people.
  • Become genuinely interested in other people.
  • Be a good listener and encourage others to talk about themselves.

Building quality relationships is one of life's purest pleasures, and your most important responsibility because it's the surest path to your success.